Sunday, July 10, 2011

The Chinese are Nice?

I remember when I was growing up, I had a few Chinese friends and I thought they were all so nice. Everyone did. Their parents were also nice. They were friendly, shy and generous. I thought that all Chinese people were like that. I was wrong.

After 15 years living in China and Taiwan, I now see that most Chinese and Taiwanese people really are two-faced; they literally show the world two distinct personalities in an almost schizophrenic ruse.

The first is the over-generous, sometimes shy, sometimes friendly introvert that most Westerners see ... and like. However, the other face, the one you see when you have lived among them and been married to them and had children with them is quite different. That face shows their ugly, arrogant, selfish, self-centred, conniving and hateful side, and most of them have it. Once you start noticing this side of their personalities, you start seeing just how cruel and malicious many of them are. On top of that, many have anger-management and self-control issues (hence the unspoken epidemic of wife and child beating in these cultures, and the multitude of stalkers, public masturbators and peeping toms).

Their arrogance deserves some attention. Believe it or not, the Chinese believe that their culture is superior to Western culture. They look down on us as fools and believe that they can manipulate us because we are gullible. And if you look at the way Western people are gazing wondrously at China's rise, it seems to be working. They always seem to use their ingenuity to back up their opinion that their culture is superior. The truth is that yes, the Chinese invented paper and gunpowder etc. several thousand years ago but did pretty much no inventing (or any other original ideas, for that matter) after that. Almost everything that they desire, every status symbol, every piece of technology and comfort, was invented in the West. Look at science, art, music, cinema, architecture, philosophy, law, medicine, sport and almost every other field you can think of and you will see almost no noticeable contribution by the Chinese - even though there are more Chinese than Westerners, all told. You will also find that there are a lot more Chinese people learning English than Westerners learning Mandarin and many more Chinese people trying to get out of China than Westerners trying to get in. Heck, I think half of Taiwan has a US or Canadian passport - or it seems so. So if their culture is better, why does it seem that they are far more interested in the Western culture than we are of Chinese culture? Personally, I think that there is no foundation for their arrogance.

Then there is the all-encompassing money-lust - their willingness to literally do anything for money. People everywhere are greedy and many focus too much on money. However, the Chinese take it to a whole new level. Their lives are consumed by the rush to make money as, in China money gives you status and status gives you guanxi (connections that will do you "favours"). Children as young as 3 know that money is all-important and the rich flaunt what they have and horde what they make. The money they make is used to buy flashy foreign luxury goods like German cars, the latest American gadgets and Italian handbags, all of which are paraded for the world to see. 

The money-lust is also why they cut corners and can't seem to do anything properly. Hence the constant flow of news about food and toys made with poisonous ingredients, gadgets that don't work properly and so on. Yes, there is corruption everywhere, but not deliberate corporate criminality that results in children or pets being poisoned. And it happens regularly in China and Taiwan, even today. Only a month ago, Taiwan was rocked by the scandal of a factory owner who substituted DEHP (some sort of plastic derivative) for approved clouding agents that were used in everything from fruit juice to yoghurt to children's candy. This was not a mistake. It was deliberate and done so he could keep more of the money for himself.
In the big earthquake in China a few years back, most of the schools that collapsed (burying thousands of children alive) did so because corners were cut in their construction and money pocketed. To date, no-one has been arrested for this.
The cutting of corners extends to not paying taxes or dues. A friend's Taiwanese wife was annoyed that she wasn't going to get a refund from the tax department last year after declaring only a fraction of her earnings and getting away with it. Apparently, she usually got money from the tax department.

Then there is the way they bring their kids up. Most Taiwanese kids (and more and more Chinese kids) spend all day at school and then have to go to extra lessons (cram schools that in many cases are nothing but money-making scams) most evenings and even Saturdays. Weekends are then spent doing homework for school and the extramural classes with perhaps one outing with the family per weekend. The parents maintain that they send their kids to these classes to help their studies, but my personal opinion is that many just don't want to be bothered with their kids. Housewives bundling their kids off to extra lessons and going shopping instead of spending time with their offspring is not uncommon. There is very little emphasis on sport or a balanced lifestyle in these countries, and this leads to many kids having emotional problems because they have no way to release pressure or vent frustration. What is more, most couples are expected to have children, with male offspring still being preferred, and more and more of them are spoiled, obnoxious weaklings protected by overbearing, pushy parents. Often, boys are fawned over by parents and girls merely tolerated. Few parents bother teaching manners or common courtesy to their children and leave it up to someone else (the schools or after-school care). This way, they think they can't be blamed.
And talking about kids being obnoxious and without any civility, how about this; imagine being a forty-five year old father of three walking along the street and having a fifteen year old (standing with his friends and obviously showing off) blurting out "Go fuck your mother!" at you just behind your back. Or being called a son-of-a-bitch to your face by a teenager emboldened by the presence of two or three friends. This has happened numerous times to me and most Westerners I know who have lived in these countries for a while. Back home, the kid would get his nose and/or jaw broken. Here, even grabbing and threatening them would most probably result in you being arrested and either imprisoned or expelled from the country. Kids here have not been taught even rudimentary manners, which is not a cultural difference. I know this this because I have met people who are civil. Those that aren't just couldn't care, I guess.
There are some good parents, however, but from what I have seen they are in the minority.

Finally, for this post at least, there is the racism. Yes, many Chinese people are racist. One example is where white, American-looking males get teaching jobs quite easily in China and particularly in Taiwan. However, blacks or even dark-haired Westerners struggle as they are not really acceptable in the eyes of most school owners (who in turn reflect the views of their customers, the parents who support the "school"). Then there's the staring and the rude remarks uttered at Westerners all the time, things that would not be tolerated in Western countries. But the racism isn't just leveled at us "round-eyes". Many of the Chinese I have dealt with hate the Koreans and Japanese and Taiwanese too. And the Taiwanese I have spoken to about this hate everyone except the Americans (after all, they think Taiwan is America's fifty-first state, or they act that way, and they just loooooooooooove the US). To see the racism in action, do anything to upset a Chinese person and they will tell you quite plainly to get out of their country. In other words, stay in Taiwan or China as long as it suits the locals but then get out when we don't need you any more. This is something we should apply in the West.





Yes, it's their culture I guess and were it confined to the Far East, I would so no problem. But as more and more Chinese people pour into Western countries, the people living there must realise that their opinions of their new neighbours does not necessarily gel with the reality. And yes, this might seem like a racist rant - and perhaps it is - but if you are a Westerner and have lived in China or Taiwan and been part of society there, you will know it's all true.

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